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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/24762382">We can't run from the wind and the thunder</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/HopeSilverheart/pseuds/HopeSilverheart'>HopeSilverheart</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Loving Em at 2AM [26]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Shadowhunters (TV), The Shadowhunter Chronicles - All Media Types</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Alternate Universe - Criminals, Blood and Injury, Boys In Love, Crime Boss Alec Lightwood, Crimes &amp; Criminals, Cuddles, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Established Relationship, Fluff, Guns, Hurt/Comfort, Light Angst, M/M, Minor Injuries, Organized Crime, Secrets</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-06-17</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-06-17</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-04 06:42:24</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Mature</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>3,701</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/24762382</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/HopeSilverheart/pseuds/HopeSilverheart</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>He closed his eyes and breathed in deeply, trying to swallow back the sounds that threatened to spill past his lips.</p><p>When he opened them again, his gaze settled on his window. Or more specifically, on his curtains – his open curtains. His heart skipped a beat as he let his eyes trail towards the neighbouring apartment complex. Magnus’ curtains were open too and, unsurprisingly, Alec’s boyfriend was home.</p><p>Home and staring at him with horrified eyes.</p><p>Or: Magnus finally finds out what Alec really does for a living.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Magnus Bane/Alec Lightwood</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Loving Em at 2AM [26]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/1764400</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>9</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>184</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>We can't run from the wind and the thunder</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><ul class="associations">
      <li>For <a href="https://archiveofourown.org/users/thatnerdemryn/gifts">thatnerdemryn</a>.</li>



    </ul><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>title is from ben platt's 'rain'</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The mission had been harder than what Alec had anticipated. There had been more men involved than their source had mentioned, and his team of six simply hadn’t been enough.</p><p>They had succeeded, of course, and had gotten rid of their target, but every single one of the men and women he had taken with him had gone home with wounds that could have easily been avoided. Alec himself had had to bandage up a flesh wound on his leg and would probably limp around for a few weeks – days, if he were lucky, but he very rarely was.</p><p>Thankfully, Isabelle and Lydia hadn’t been on the mission with him, so they would be able to lead the missions he couldn’t in the next few weeks. The two women had a strange relationship going on, based mostly on insults and heaps of sexual tension, but he trusted both of them with his life. If he asked them for help, they would comply and leave behind their grievances.</p><p>For now, though, he had to make sure the wound wouldn’t get infected. He hated dealing with his injuries alone, but he hadn’t wanted to bother his people any more than he already had. It was his punishment, in a way. He hadn’t been prepared and his subordinates had suffered because of it, so now it was his turn to suffer.</p><p>Still, he really hoped he wasn’t about to ruin his perfectly good couch. Having to replace pieces of furniture because of blood wasn’t something he wanted to explain to Magnus. His boyfriend of three months was already suspicious, and Alec didn’t want to add fuel to fire. Magnus finding out about his real job would get him into nothing but trouble. Crime organisations were secret for a reason, and Alec knew his opponents were ready to go to great lengths to hurt him.</p><p>As long as Magnus didn’t know who Alec really was, they would leave him alone. Or at least, Alec hoped so.</p><p>Shaking his head to dispel thoughts of his boyfriend, Alec bent over his leg to get a better look at the gunshot wound. There was no major or long-lasting damage, but it still hurt like hell. And it would leave yet another scar that Magnus would feel the need to comment on. Another clue about Alec’s position in the city. It was the last thing he needed, but it wasn’t something he could avoid.</p><p>Bullets left scars, and there was nothing Alec could do about it. He could, however, make sure he wouldn’t catch some nasty diseases because of his lack of attention to detail. Isabelle would murder him if she found out he was taking care of himself, so he had to make sure she wouldn’t suspect anything. As far as she would be concerned, he had gone straight to the infirmary and had someone check him out.</p><p>Truthfully, he grit his teeth as he poured disinfectant all over the hole in his skin and dug around his medical kit for something he could use as stitches. He had everything packed away for emergencies like this one, but his head wasn’t exactly at its clearest. Getting shot tended to dull his senses and make him sleepier than usual, which was why he usually preferred <em>dodging</em> bullets.</p><p>And why he had made their target’s death a little crueller and longer than what the man really deserved.</p><p>He hissed as some of the disinfectant seeped into the wound, burning his flesh. If there was one thing that sucked more than getting hurt, it was having to heal himself. He closed his eyes and breathed in deeply, trying to swallow back the sounds that threatened to spill past his lips.</p><p>When he opened them again, his gaze settled on his window. Or more specifically, on his curtains – his <em>open</em> curtains. His heart skipped a beat as he let his eyes trail towards the neighbouring apartment complex. Magnus’ curtains were open too and, unsurprisingly, Alec’s boyfriend was home.</p><p>Home and staring at him with horrified eyes. Alec shook his head, imploring his boyfriend to ignore him and go back to sleep. He didn’t want Magnus over – lies – and he certainly didn’t want him to see Alec in this state. He was at his weakest, at his most vulnerable, and he didn’t like the idea of someone being around him.</p><p>Magnus had always been different, of course, but this was… This was something else. This was Alec Lightwood, crime boss and head of the Lightwood Organisation, wounded and bleeding all over his couch. This was Alec Lightwood, heartless bastard who had just murdered someone in cold blood.</p><p>Magnus liked him when he was his flustered, daytime self. There was no telling how he would react to the other, less pleasant side of Alec. But Magnus was nothing if not curious, and Alec knew his hopes had always been in vain. His boyfriend was already racing out of his apartment, barely taking the time to put a shirt on.</p><p>Alec had two minutes, three maximum, before Magnus came barging into his home. He still had time to hide his gun, to put his bloody arrows away and make up some absurd story about what had happened. He could still keep Magnus in the dark, if that were what he really wanted.</p><p>But Alec had never truly lied before. Yes, he had omitted a few truths, but this would be crossing a line. If he lied about his whereabouts that night, he would always live in fear of Magnus finding out the truth. And then, his boyfriend would never be able to trust him again.</p><p>So instead of hiding his weapons, Alec finished patching up his wound. All it took were a few, well-executed stitches, and he was as good as new. He tied the end of the medical string up just as Magnus marched into his apartment, fear, worry, and anger written all over his face.</p><p>“Alexander.”</p><p>That one word was enough to make Alec’s defences break down. Alec had been alive for over two decades, but no one had managed to get to him the way Magnus did. No one made him feel as worthy and happy as Magnus did. He should have known his secret would come out eventually; even if he had lied about this mission, he would have told Magnus someday.</p><p>He wouldn’t have been able to continue lying to the man he loved.</p><p>“Magnus,” he murmured, covering his wound with gauze and bandages before standing up. He winced slightly at the movement but tried his best not to let his discomfort show on his face. “What are you doing here?”</p><p>“What am I doing here?” Magnus exclaimed, gesturing wildly at Alec, his eyes wide and panicked. “Alexander, you’re hurt and carrying a gun, did you really think I was going to leave you alone? We’ve been together for three months; I thought we were past all these secrets.”</p><p>“I wish you’d left me alone,” Alec muttered, grabbing his gun and tossing it onto the couch, not wanting Magnus to assume the worst from him. “Damn it, Magnus, there’s a reason I haven’t told you everything about my life. Three months is a lot, but it won’t mean anything if you’re de-”</p><p>Alec cut himself off, running his finders through his hair and biting back the words that so desperately wanted to leave his mouth. Maybe if he told Magnus about his fears, his boyfriend would understand why Alec had hidden things from him.</p><p>Or maybe he would run away and never come back.</p><p>“If I’m what, Alec?” Magnus threw his hands in the air. “<em>Dead</em>?”</p><p>Alec flinched away from his boyfriend, the word hitting him harder than he had thought it would. It was one thing to think about Magnus getting tangled up in organisation business and being hurt; it was another to hear the words spoken out loud as carelessly as Magnus had just done.</p><p>“I didn’t say that,” Alec murmured, turning away from his boyfriend and busying himself with the medical kit in front of him. He tidied everything up, hoping it would occupy him long enough to get Magnus out of the apartment.</p><p>“You didn’t have to,” Magnus scoffed. “You show up here with blood on your hands and legs, you leave knives and guns laying around your apartment, and you clearly want to keep me away from whatever it is you’re hiding. I assumed you were a secret agent, but I’m suddenly second-doubting myself. Is what you do even- Alexander, do you run an illegal business?”</p><p>“Well, I wouldn’t call it a business,” Alec chuckled, snapping the kit’s lid shut and sighing deeply before twisting around to stare at Magnus head-on. He crossed his arms over his chest, knowing he looked defensive but not caring in the slightest. “But yes, my organisation is both illegal and dangerous, hence the careful omissions of truth. I’d say I’m sorry, but I’m not <em>really</em>. I wanted to keep you safe and I won’t apologise for that.”</p><p>“Keep me safe from what, Alexander?” Magnus asked pleadingly. “Your enemies? They could have attacked me even if I didn’t know about you and your… whatever it is you do for a living. But if I had been aware of it, at least I would have been prepared. So you can talk about protection if you want to, but we both know what this was really about. You were afraid, cowardly, and you didn’t want me to leave you because of the truth.”</p><p>“I wouldn’t expect you to understand, Magnus,” Alec shook his head, smiling sadly at his boyfriend. “The crime world is a lot more complicated than you might assume. Maybe I was afraid, but it doesn’t change the fact that <em>knowing</em> isn’t a good thing. It’s the opposite of a good thing.”</p><p>“So what, you were going to keep me in the dark forever?” Magnus whispered, his voice cracking. “And let me wonder about your scars and the blood on your clothes and your frequent disappearances for the rest of my life.”</p><p>Deep down, Alec’s heart warmed at the thought that Magnus wanted to spend his life with him, of all people. On the outside, however, his mask was firmly in place. He didn’t know what Magnus wanted to hear, but Alec was sure he couldn’t give it to him. Instead, he pressed his lips together and waited for his boyfriend to say something else. Maybe if he let Magnus get everything out of his system, they could figure things out and stay together.</p><p>Besides, he had a feeling that speaking would only make things worse.</p><p>“I just don’t understand wha-”</p><p>Alec’s phone rang loudly, interrupting whatever Magnus had been about to say. Alec cursed under his breath, taking his phone out and checking the caller ID before accepting it, sending an apologetic look Magnus’ way. His boyfriend rolled his eyes and turned away from him, clearly not wanting to be involved in Alec’s business. Not that he could blame him.</p><p>“<em>Boss, we have a situation</em>.”</p><p>Lydia’s voice was clear and frantic, and Alec knew he had to leave. His boyfriend meant the world to him, but his people needed him more than Magnus did right then.</p><p>“I’m on my way,” he said firmly, easily slipping into his usual, criminal role. “In the meantime, try not to make things worse. And if this is about field work, find me a replacement. I’m in no shape to go out, not after the bullet I took earlier. And remember, you’re in charge right now. If anyone bothers you, don’t be afraid to knock the sense back into them.”</p><p>With that, he hung up, grabbing his two favourite guns and stuffing them back into their holsters. He rolled his pants back down to cover his wound, made sure he had his money and fake ID on him, then stood up straight, stepping towards his front door.</p><p>“I have important business to take care of,” he murmured when Magnus and he were only a few inches away from one another. “I don’t know if you still want to talk to me after all of this, but you’re welcome to wait here for me. I shouldn’t be too long, hopefully.”</p><p>Magnus’ nod was almost unnoticeable, but it was there nevertheless. Alec smiled at him softly and pressed a kiss to his boyfriend’s forehead before hurrying out of the room. His work at the organisation had better be fast, because he was in no mood to stay there for longer than an hour.</p><p>He had a relationship to save.</p><p> </p>
<hr/><p> </p><p>He ended up having to stay at the Lightwood building for a little under two hours. He was impatient and snappish all along, dismissing everyone whose problems weren’t urgent and sending them to Lydia instead. He didn’t have the time to deal with all his demanding people. He’d already had enough on his plate with the conflict Lydia had brought to his attention as well as the five injured people he had had to check up on after the mission.</p><p>By the time he made it back to his apartment, he was tired and cranky and in pain. He shouldn’t have been standing and walking around for so long, not with such a fresh wound on his leg. Unfortunately, he hadn’t exactly had a choice, however it didn’t help make him feel any better about himself or this thrice-damned night.</p><p>It took him a second to realise his front door was still unlocked and notice the thin strip of light streaming out from the frame of the door. He had assumed Magnus would have gone home already, sick of waiting for him. His boyfriend had a key to his apartment, so he would have locked up behind himself if he had left, which meant he was still there.</p><p>Alec had taken two hours to get back from work, and Magnus had waited. If that wasn’t a clear sign that Magnus wanted to talk and figure things out, he didn’t know what was.</p><p>He pushed the door open and rushed inside, stopping in the middle of his living room when he spotted the bundle of blankets on his sofa. His gaze softened as it landed on his boyfriend’s face, as peaceful as it always was when Magnus slept. If Magnus still felt comfortable and safe enough to sleep in Alec’s apartment, surely it had to mean he didn’t completely hate Alec.</p><p>A few steps were all it took for him to reach the couch. As soon as he was next to Magnus, he dropped to his knees and let his fingers card through his boyfriend’s hair. Magnus stirred in his sleep but didn’t wake up yet, so Alec shook his shoulder lightly. His boyfriend would probably grumble about the interruption, but it would be better than waking up to an annoyed Magnus who hadn’t slept well because he had decided to crash on the couch rather than the bed.</p><p>“Magnus,” he whispered, pressing a kiss to his boyfriend’s cheek and rubbing their noses together, something that never failed to make Magnus giggle softly. It seemed this time was no exception. A small smile tugged at Magnus’ lips and, seconds later, he was waking up, eyes bleary and hooded and as beautiful as always. “Hey love, let’s get you to bed.”</p><p>“Can’t carry me,” Magnus mumbled, sitting up and rubbing at his eyes sleepily. “You’re hurt, ‘xander. I should be th’one taking care of you, not the other way around.”</p><p>“There’s no rule about who should take care of who,” Alec chuckled. “But I’ll admit that I’m in no shape to carry you. Thankfully, we both have fully functional legs. Well, one of mine is a bit damaged but I got through two hours of work, so I’m sure I can walk to my own bedroom.”</p><p>“Two hours?” Magnus gaped, slapping Alec’s shoulder lightly. Suddenly, the man seemed a lot more awake. “Alexander, you told me you wouldn’t be gone for longer than an hour. Your leg must be killing you right now! Do your subordinates even know about your injury, or were you wandering around pretending to be completely okay? <em>Don’t</em> answer that, by the way. I don’t want to know. The only thing I want is to get you into bed so you can get the rest you so desperately need.”</p><p>“And so we can talk,” Alec added, pulling Magnus up and allowing his boyfriend to slip a protective arm around his waist as they made their way to the bedroom. “Right? We’re going to talk before we go to sleep, aren’t we?”</p><p>Magnus tilted his head to the side curiously, his eyes trailing over Alec’s face several times as though he was looking for something. Eventually, he must have found the answer to whatever question he had been asking himself, because he sighed and nodded in Alec’s direction.</p><p>“If you want to talk, then sure,” he said softly, closing the bedroom door behind them and shooing Alec towards the bathroom as he grabbed a spare shirt Alec always left laying around for his boyfriend to find. “Go get ready for bed, and don’t take longer than ten if you want that conversation to happen tonight. I’m tired, and I’m pretty sure the only thing that could keep me awake right now is a discussion about my apparently criminal boyfriend.”</p><p>Alec winced at the phrasing but complied, getting through his evening ablutions in record time and slipping into bed just as Magnus turned off the lights. Less than a minute later, they were cuddled together, hands entwined and breaths mingling where they faced each other.</p><p>“So,” Magnus started, raising his free hand to caress Alec’s cheek. “You’re the head of some sort of mob?”</p><p>“A crime organisation, actually,” Alec corrected, ignoring his boyfriend’s exasperated eyeroll. “It’s not exactly the same thing. If Lydia ever hears you call our organisation a mob, you might just lose a finger or two.”</p><p>“Luckily for me, I’m sleeping with the boss,” Magnus grinned, poking Alec in the chest. “That has to give me some protection from your subordinates, right? None of them would dare hurt their leader’s lover. Or at least, I hope not, because I’m fairly certain I’ve already angered one of your men a few times. Although in my defence, I didn’t know he was a dangerous criminal.”</p><p>“None of my people will hurt you,” Alec assured his boyfriend, dismissing Magnus’ jokes to focus on the real worry in the man’s eyes. “They all answer to me and know how unhappy I would be if they ever laid a hand on the man I love. The real danger here are the other organisations, as well as my targets. Some people won’t hesitate to come after you if they thought it might hurt me; which it would, I assure you. I can promise that I’ll do everything in my power to keep you safe, but…”</p><p>“But there’s only so much you can do,” Magnus finished for him, smiling softly at Alec. “I understand that. However, that’s not going to make me leave you, Alexander. Do I wish you had told me about this earlier? Yes, absolutely. However, I understand why you didn’t. We’ve only been together for three months, and this is- it’s pretty huge. I don’t blame you for keeping it a secret, even though I’m a little angry that it had to come out this way. You didn’t have to get shot to tell me about this, you know?”</p><p>Alec’s eyes widened disbelievingly for an instant before he burst out laughing, kissing Magnus’ pout off his lips. His boyfriend was too adorable for his own good, even when he was standing his ground whilst simultaneously letting Alec know that he was forgiven for his mistakes.</p><p>Alec knew Magnus was flawed too – although not as much as him, since at least his boyfriend wasn’t a criminal – but there were times when he wondered what he had done to deserve such an amazing man’s love. There were hundreds of people out there who would like nothing more than to be with Magnus, but he had chosen <em>Alec</em> and continued to choose him, even though he now knew that his boyfriend was a wanted criminal.</p><p>Well, perhaps he didn’t know about the wanted part yet, but he had to have his suspicions. It wasn’t like Alec was one to do things halfway. His organisation was one of the best ones, but it was still on the FBI’’s radar. He was sure Magnus was smart enough to come to that conclusion by himself.</p><p>“I’m still going to make it up to you,” Alec whispered against his boyfriend’s lips. “I’m going to shower you in gifts and attention and everything else you might want or need. This injury means a lot of bedrest and paperwork, so I’m going to have plenty of time for you, for once.”</p><p>“Ah, so the injury had several purposes,” Magnus snapped his fingers, eyes lighting up with mirth. “Perfect opportunity to tell your boyfriend about your secret job, and the best way to get free holidays. You’re a genius, Alexander, truly. If your leg wasn’t hurt, I might show you just how turned on I get by your skills and wit.”</p><p>“Tease,” Alec groaned, burying his head in the crook of Magnus’ neck. “I’ll get you back for that later, when I’m not injured and exhausted and seconds away from passing out.”</p><p>“I’m sure you will,” Magnus chuckled. “But until then, get some sleep darling. You certainly deserve it after tonight. Besides, I’ll still be here in the morning, and every morning that you want me by your side. I’m not leaving you, Alexander, criminal or not.”</p><p>“’s good,” Alec mumbled, already halfway asleep. “I love you, M’gnus.”</p><p>“I love you too, Alexander.”</p><p>And really, it was as simple as that. Magnus didn’t care about Alec’s secret life the same way that Alec wouldn’t if their roles were reversed. Some things were worth everything, every risk, and their relationship was one of them.</p><p>That night, he fell asleep thinking about the man he was going to marry someday.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Heya guys! Thank you so much for reading! Still no beta, and probably still mistakes that I apologise for. I really wanted to write more Malec in this universe, so here it goes! I'll be writing their first date soon too, so look out for that. I hope you enjoyed this fic!</p><p>Love, Junie. </p><p>(find me on tumblr @hopesilverheart)</p></blockquote></div></div>
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